The Name Game.

So there’s the name issue. What to name this little person that is now big enough to literally push against me in every direction at once, that’s how little space i have left in my belly. Jake felt him last night, pushing against me, perhaps trying to convince me to get up since i was on my side, and Jake has felt him before, but never like this, this kid was trying to break out of my uterus ...thank god hes not smart enough yet to know where the door is...

Either way Jake freaked out,

“you feel this all the time?! This is insane...”

Tell me about it. The other day i was sitting on the floor cross legged leaning (as much as possible) forward and he kicked me/pushed me and my boob moved.  There’s that much effort there. So maybe he will be a tough little thing.

Anyways,  i have 9 weeks to name this baby.  Holy cow does time ever fly. I can say that now because its so close, and its becoming startling obvious that there IS a baby in me, and that either he’s  going to be coming out soon, or I’m going to explode.  To be honest, its probably a combination of both, he IS coming out AND im going to explode.  Yikes.

I am sitting here writing this and feeling this little baby in there pushing my laptop away. Not bumping it, pushing on it. So I have recently started pushing back...I have a feeling this is how our relationship will be once he’s a teenager, he will push the boundaries and limits I set and I need to start learning how to push back at some point. This is the easiest way to start. Also, its a little alarming that he responds to me now...Im thinking its some kind of knee I’m pushing back on...which also...kind of alarming.

Anyways, I have to name this baby. I think that’s what I had been talking about....

So theres lots of concerns when naming a baby....things you don’t really think about until you LITERALLY have to name one ...not just theoretically speaking. I always used to think i just KNEW the names i would choose because at that point, its easy, since there was no human growing in me that literally needed a name in 9 weeks.

SO the issues are as follows:

1.Do you like it? 

Theres lots of names that are strong good names for boys, but you have to actually like the name, you have to like how it sounds . Does it only sound good when you say it in reference to someone else or does it sound like something you want to name your unborn child? Do you want to say it for the rest of your life in reference to your family?  Does it sound good when you say it happily and when you sternly use it? Cause with a little boy that may be super important when he has decided to mix dirt into your cookie dough batter.

2. Did you ever date/know/hate someone with that name?

This doesn’t seem that huge, because to you, you’re like, well i wouldn’t choose a name that was attached to someone i had some negative feelings towards, so we’re safe there. However, you are forgetting that you didn’t get pregnant alone. Theres that guy that owns half that baby too involved and he also has known like 500 people in his life, so when you combine them, you get messy. Say youve met like 500 people in your life, chances are you haven’t been pumped on at least 25% of them, either you didn’t like them, or you did like them but they aren’t people you could ever name your child after. So theres like 125 people with names you don’t like for sure. OR you have people in your life you adore, but its weird to name your baby after that person, like your good friends, so there's another say 15% of people you adore, so you cant really use their name as the first name of your baby. So theres another 75 names you don’t want to use because they are too involved/relevant in your life. Now combine that 200 names with the 200 names your husband also has in his book and you have just elimated like 400 names. ( okay so this may be slightly dramatic but you get the point) This again, limits the name game.

3. Whats in a name?

So you both have found a name that is sounding like you are finally on the right track...and then you look up what it means. Say, Sawyer? Sounds good, okay so lets see what it means...

“Man who Saws Wood”

Hm. Well thats not very powerful. And kind of disappointing.  Okay so say you like the name Mason:

“Bricklayer” or “Man who lays Brick”

Again. Not exactly the meaning of the name I would like for my new baby....However, I am a nurse and I have hammered with the CRITICAL THINKING side of things...so instead, i will search meanings and choose my babies name from there....

Okay so lets search for names that mean good things...like Strength:

Armstrong

Dureau

Bernard

......hm. well....this isn’t ideal either...

Okay so names that mean Peaceful:

Korey

Wilfredo

Fred

.....This isn’t working either.

There you go, some examples of how annoying it can be to choose a name for a child that you haven’t met and don’t want to doom to a life of sawing wood or laying bricks simply because you liked how it sounded....

However, that being said, this cant be that relevant since lots of people name their babies names that sound awesome, LIKE sawyer and say to hell with what it means, its my kid and he will make his name his own.  I need to be more like that. That would make things easier for sure. And the worst part is that i AGREE with that logic, so why I cant apply this to naming my own baby is bizarre.

4.  Middle names

So you have chosen a nice name for your baby. Say its John.  So what is Johns middle name? It has to flow you know. Sigh.  So you can do a one syllable first name with a two syllable middle name like John Michael.  But John Jack...or John Sean...or John Chad....doesn’t sound so awesome. Or a long first name like Alexander, with a short middle name like Alexander John....it gets complicated.

AND are you going to use a name that’s in your family? Are you going to middle name the baby with someone’s name? And how do you choose which name? Or what if all the family names have been used? Do you just use a name you like the sound of? Or do you choose one from you or your husband? AGAIN more confusion.

5. So say you get through ALL these things... you find the perfect name and everything is great, and you live in a world of simplicity and wonderment....but then you meet the baby. He has blue eyes instead of brown, and a smile that doesn’t quite say Michael John Smith to you....he seems more gentle than competitive....he is calm instead of rowdy....so now your perfect world has crashed around you because the perfect name you chose, doesn’t suit the perfect baby you just met.

This is what will happen to me i think.

So you see my predicament. I have learned to never judge what people name their kid because man...it sucks to figure out.  And i kind of envy the parents that just say forget it, im naming this baby and thats that. I also think that just because you have opinions about names, you don’t really get to have opinions in naming someone else’s baby, since as i have clearly pointed out, its tricky work.

So far we do have some names figured out, we have like 4 on the table. But chances are good that come that day in November, I will be overly emotional and decide that his name will be something crazy like Arnie...or Archie.

Or maybe he will come out and just tell me his name. That would be both awesome and super helpful.

Im banking on the fact that once i meet him his name will become pretty clear. And if not, Jake will do it.