Theres an onion in my belly. The website that tells you how big your fetus is each week told me that I now have an onion...last week we had an avocado in there...I told jake, and then he brought a whole bunch of avocados home to put in salads...I felt weird about it. We are now officially 17 weeks pregnant. I have a baby the size of an onion in my tummy. And let me tell you. I can tell.
Well, i cant tell tell. I cant see it. But i can see that my stomach doesn’t fit in my pants anymore. And that i cant sleep on my belly at work on the stretchers anymore....it limits my breathing, which is a problem. For me and for the baby, since it breathes via me. I also am upset by the fact taht i cant eat much at atime right now. Im not sure i can blame that on the pregnancy...but im going to. I figure that space is constricted in there. Leaving less room for celery and cheese whiz. Boo.
BUT 17 weeks means that we are only 3 weeks away from boy or girl time. Thats right, we are finding out. I don’t want to hear all the “ooooh why?! Its so much fun to find out when you give birth”
Um no. The last thing I will care about at that point will be if it has boy parts or girl parts, at that point all im going to be caring about is taking care of my parts...and making sure they stay the way i would like them to. And Im also not that person that can just “let go” and “let it be” and all that crap. I need to know. I need some control. I feel like none of this pregnancy so far has in my control...i mean i didn’t plan it ...but i sure can plan a nursery. And im entitled to it.
And I do want a particular one of these babies, boy or girl. I want a girl. I don’t know why..i just do. I think its because I think Jake is going to give me boys. And i like to go against the grain..or against jake as often as possible to make things interesting. I explained to Jake several times in many ways that men make the baby’s gender.
Lesson one in how if this baby is a boy its Jakes fault:
Lady parts carry this gene : Girl/Girl thats all my eggs have got. They can only make girls.
Boy parts carry this one: Girl/Boy or Girl/Girl so jake has options on which card to use.
Combine my Girl/Girl egg with Jakes Girl/Girl, we get ultimately, a girl. (the word girl sounds weird now..i don’t like typing it)
Combine my Girl/Girl with Jakes Girl/Boy...we have ourselves a baby that pees in your face by accident.
Now, I should make myself clear, (as Jake as been worried about t his in the past) I will love the baby either way, I mean it will be something I made, and threw up probably approximately 103 times just to grow, and it will be something that me and jake can teach to be as cool as we were in our golden years. And lets face it, it will be pretty cute no matter what. But right now, now that I don’t know what it is and i get to be unrealistic and hopeful and nobody can really tell me its wrong to hope for one or another because im the one baking it, I want a girl. That being said, for everyone that says, well as long as its healthy it doesn’t matter....thats bull. By saying i want a girl im not saying that i don’t want a healthy baby. These two things are not related and cannot be put int he same sentence. You can say, I hope the baby is healthy. And i Hope the baby is a girl/boy. But you cant say it has to be one or the other. Lots of people have healthy babies that are boys or girls. In fact most do. So no more of the “it doesn’t matter” . it does. To alot of people.
And im one. However, boy babies are awesome too. I just keep reminding myselef that if i am having a boy, he could be super cute/super fun/super adorable like my nephew Evan is. Which would totally be great too. So yes. I want a girl at this point, but im pretty sure either way, Im set. Babies are babies and our baby is our baby. And also, if its a boy then Jake has to do more of the work i figure at a certain point...like with the sex talks. So thats pretty sweet.
However, I am imagining a life filled with unicorns, my little ponies, curly hair in pigtails and Dora the explorer at this point. And im entitled to that dream. Plus I like the names we have picked out for girls.
However, if everyone else has boys this year, then maybe we will want a boy so we can make them all be friends until the end of time, and have barbeques and coach baseball teams all together. That would also be fun. Okay Im getting myself confused again. So I need stop writing down thoughts and just get back to my day. I will start posting pictures of my enormity starting soon. for all to enjoy...and feel smug that they are normal sized about.
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